Horror and apocalyptic Saturday! WOOO!

Hi, folks–

Skip on over to Women and Words if you haven’t already to catch my interview with horror/surreal writer Gina Ranalli. I call her a surrealist, too, because she seamlessly blends the macabre with comedy in a lot of her work, and the effect is a really cool juxtaposition of contrasting moods and emotions. Definitely give her a looksee. Here’s the link to that interview.

I had a dream last night that the world as we know it is going to end in September, 2015. WTF? I’m supposed to go to Milwaukee, according to my dream, because this is where I’ll be reasonably safe. I’m not sure what sort of apocalypse this entails, but there it is. Oh, and I’m supposed to introduce myself to the chief of police in Milwaukee so the force knows I’ll be coming.


source: Cafepress

Um…yeah. Milwaukee’s a great place, don’t get me wrong. Been there, too. Nice city. But as I’ve told people many times, in any kind of scary sort of apocalypse, it’s probably not a good idea to be near heavily populated areas, especially if it’s a zombie sort of meltdown because, as we all know by now, the more people, the more zombies. In other sorts of meltdowns, heavily populated areas will most likely become heavily lawless areas. I mean, think about it. People are going to be freaking out and trying to survive as best they can. And when that happens, in 2-3 days, all bets are off. So stay away from those urban areas. Even nice ones like Milwaukee.

In smaller communities (say, small towns) where most people know each other and it’s not a zombie kind of meltdown, you’ll probably have a better shot at staying put. Especially if you’re known in the community. That’s not always a guarantee — survival makes people go nutso — but you’ll probably have a better shot at weathering more storms in a smaller community like that than a larger. However, what people in smaller communities need to worry about is the so-called “outsiders” showing up. That is, people escaping larger cities and wandering around and ending up in smaller communities. Not all of them have bad intentions. But desperation makes for bad situations. This is pretty basic human behavior, kids. You cannot count on anything except yourself, pretty much, in a meltdown, and sadly, you cannot just trust that others aren’t going to do some crazy stuff in the midst of scary times. Bummer, I know.

Now, depending on how long the meltdown goes on, survivors will probably eventually empty the cities (leaving a few behind). At that juncture, you might be able to go into what once were heavily populated areas (if it’s not a zombie apocalypse) and scrounge for supplies or even set up housing for a while. But be aware that people, like animals, get a little territorial and that could prove a problem for you, the “outsider.” So always, always be cautious in your travels during a meltdown.


source: post-apocalyptic pictures

Something else to think about in a meltdown is that a situation like that invariably exacerbates existing ideological mindsets, layering them over levels of desperation and freak-out. So that guy who lives in the hills in his bunker railing about the government coming to get him? That’s only going to get worse in a meltdown, no matter what causes the meltdown. And, depending on the type of apocalypse (excluding zombie), you might see small groups of survivors forming new sorts of hierarchies in order to develop some semblance of control and order in a really out-of-control situation. I do not recommend dealing with groups like that. Remember, all rules are gone and all bets are off and groups like that will be making their own rules, regardless of how ethical they are. Think Lord of the Flies. But if that’s your thing — if you’re willing to do that for a sense of safety in numbers — good luck.

I’ll talk later about things you can learn now that’ll help you in a situation that — yikes — might be a major meltdown.

Zombie apocalypse survival tip!

Hi, all–

Whew. A busy week. Hope everyone’s going to have a great Labor Day Weekend! And if you’re part of the contingent out there along the Gulf Coast of in the Crescent City who thought “oh, cool! Beach weekend!”, well, bummer. Tropical Storm Lee, as you no doubt have already found out, is bringing tons of rain. And then the storm will move northeast, so Texas and Oklahoma won’t get any of that much-needed rain. Dang. For those of you in the path of Lee, stay safe.

And speaking of storms, if you can help in the clean-up of Hurricane Irene, here’s a list of organizations accepting donations. Please share it far and wide, because these organizations are not only helping with Irene, but they help all kinds of people following all kinds of disasters all over. Thanks.

Moving along. It’s Saturday, and time now for a zombie (or other) apocalypse survival tip. This one is one you might want to start putting into play long before any sort of apocalyptic event, however. It has to do with adding to your skillz box.

Read on to find out what I’m talking about…

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In Training (for an apocalypse)

Hey, fellow apocalyptids!

Yesterday I was thinking about trains. I was thinking that I sure wish this country had a better (and high-speed) train system, because I love traveling by train. I like getting up and walking around in a train, and going to the snack bar and watching the landscape fly past out the windows. Love that. We here in the States are deprived of super awesome train travel. Not to diss on Amtrak, or anything, but seriously. We need more tracks, more trains, and we’d be able to get around this country a lot easier, I think.

Anyway, I’m getting to something, here. Seriously. Bear with me.


source

And clickie to read more.

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Bunker Hill

Okay, it’s not REALLY Bunker Hill (but if you do live there, make sure you check out the great history of the Revolutionary War. And if we’re gong to get technical, it’s also known as Breeds Hill.

But I digress.

I want to talk about bunkers, however. I have a buddy in Albuquerque and every time we get depressed about the state of the world, we threaten to dig or stock our bunkers. Given that a zombie apocalypse is the least of our worries at the moment (don’t freak — I’m concerned about that, as well), you might want to consider constructing a bunker in case all hell breaks loose, sans zombies. Because I personally do not feel that bunkers are a good idea in a zombie apocalypse, but they sure could come in handy in some parts of the world in other types of poo hitting the fan-ness.

So I found this here site for building a top secret bunker under your house.

And how about this dude? Super-serious about the Mayan calendar ending in 2012, and super-serious about his bunkers, by golly. Check out his how-to.

source
other source where I found this photo: missilebases.com

He also provides info on this handy book.

And if you’ve got access to one, here’re some tips on turning a shipping container into an underground bunker/cellar:


link

OH, and don’t forget you can also check into purchasing your very own underground (and no longer in use) missile base (or other no-longer-in-use government property! YEAH! Go check out the renovation done on an Atlas F missile silo over at that site. Seriously cool. And how about some of THESE properties? But you’d better hurry, because sales of this sort of property are way up.

My only quibble with some of these fancy schmancy bunkers is why the heck you’re going to be worried about how it looks and entertaining when it’s the freakin’ end of the world. But I digress again.

Anyway. Whew. So there you go. If you’re kind of bored this Sunday afternoon, maybe start scouting locations for a good bunker.

Happy rest of the weekend, and happy surviving!

AHHHHH!!! The Sky is STILL Falling!

Hiya, peeps.

Yesterday was Rizzoli and Isles night. I’ve blogged about them here.

So I switch over to TNT and watch Kyra Sedgwick in The Closer and then Rizzoli and Isles. The Closer has kind of grown on me, actually, and I like the characters. Then, after R&I, what should come on, but another installment of the Noah Wylie sci fi drama Falling Skies. I caught the 2-hour premiere of Falling Skies (blogged here), and I wasn’t too impressed. The worst part about it was the incessant spate of commercials. Completely disrupted the flow of the show. Completely. I didn’t watch one since then, deciding that if it was warranted, I’d check it out on DVD later.

As it happened, I watched last night’s episode, and it was pretty good. It works better as an hour-long because the pacing’s better and the commercial pacing’s better (though there are still way too many commercials). It was fairly easy for me to pick up the plot, even though I hadn’t watched anything but the first episode.

Here, we have Noah Wyle’s son Ben with the rebels; they got the harness off him, but he still has icky alien spikes protruding along his spine and the rebel doc discovers something kind of creepy about them. The skin and tissue around them is numb. So on a hunch, she goes and buts into one a skitter body they’ve got and lo and behold, she determines that the skitter was something else before it became a skitter because, buried under its bone and tissue and muscle is a harness. The implication is clear: the harness seems to somehow transform its wearer into something other than its original form. In other words, Ben and the other kid the rebels managed to get the harness off of might be on their way to alien-ville. Which reminds me of the fantastic film District 9, in which the main character is exposed to some alien fluid, which starts transforming into an alien.

The rebels also discover that there are bipedal humanoid-types who seem to be in control of both the skitters and the mechs. And our outlaw guy from the first episode? He’s figured out how to craft bullets out of mech-metal that penetrates their armor. He also discovers that a basic mech bullet is actually a bullet shell from Earth that they altered to meet their needs. The outlaw guy sardonically tells Wyle’s youngest sun, “they’re into recycling.”

Suffice it to say this one episode made me interested, so I’ll probably watch the season finale on Sunday and suffer through the commercials.

Here’s TNT’s re-cap of Episode 7.

I love an alien apocalypse show as much as the next person. In this case, if you do decide to watch Falling Skies in its entirety, I still recommend getting it on DVD or some other method where you can avoid the commercials. TNT is outta control with commercials.

Happy watching!

Sunday and the reading’s kinda fun

Hey, all–

FIRST! Check out this podcast of me chatting with the awesome folks over at the Bar Rag. WOOO!

Okay. Moving along.

As some of you may have already ascertained, I’m one of those weird apocalyptic types how is endlessly fascinated by human interaction with various end-of-the-world or natural disaster scenarios.

So thank the stars for Outside Magazine, which seems to have picked up on my weirdness and offered this piece on how to at least try to survive various disaster scenarios. No tips on zombies, but that’s okay. These might be far more relevant.

So here you go. Outside’s “The Apocalypse Handbook.” It includes survivors’ accounts of things that have happened (and they’re not always pretty).

Some of you may live in areas that these scenarios affect. Might be a good idea to get your survival kit ready and know what to do if something scary happens.

Happy reading!